Forget Tide, Mars Has Perfected the Edible Pod (in Australia)


Like so many things we’ve seen in the last few years, Tide Pods have become a tragic joke. They just look so colorful and delicious that people eat them and then get poisoned because it’s detergent. There might be something to this whole pod-eating after all, though. Australia, brave nation/continent of endless dangers, has perfected the edible pod.

The Australian branch of Mars Incorporated, the company behind M&Ms, Twix, Snickers, and other candy bars, has a line of confections simply called Pods. And as soon as I saw them, I thought it was an elaborate, well-made prank based on a recent meme about gastronomic self-abuse.

Nope, Mars Pods are an actual line of candies you can buy in Australia, or from The Australian Food Shop, which was one of the few pieces of evidence I found that this whole thing wasn’t just a talented and thorough joke web page maker messing with me. The Mars Chocolate Australia page doesn’t offer much in the way of promotional copy about Pods, but the description from TAFS goes like this:

A deliciously crunchy wafer biscuit with luscious caramel, topped with a generous helping of smooth, rich chocolate. Go on, Embrace The Chew, Befriend The Crunch.

I’ve been waiting for years, but I finally know what I’m going to get tattooed on my back. Embrace The Chew, Befriend The Crunch.

Mars Pods come in three varieties: Pods with Mars, Pods with Snickers, and Pods Twix. I’m not sure why it isn’t Pods with Twix, but Australia is a strange land with many diverse cultures and customs.

I haven’t tried Mars Pods (or Tide Pods, either), and I likely won’t because I can’t find them locally and Australia terrifies me. Seriously, it’s a huge continent of the weirdest monsters you’ll find out of the ocean. And apparently, they eat chocolate laundry pods like it’s candy down there.

The only pictures of Mars Pods I could find were of the packaging, which is a shame because I’m very curious about the structure of these mysterious confectionary treats. But I spent some more time on TAFS and found some other weird Australian candies that are either dire or hilarious, depending on how you look at them. So how about BULLETS? Or MUSK STICKS? Or CHERRY RIPE? Or OVALTEENIES? Actually, Ovaltine candies sound delicious.

Also, full credit to Youtube sociologist GaijinGoombah, whose tweet was the reason Mars Pods got on my radar in the first place. He’s a ninja-obsessed turbo-weeb who works with The Game Theorists, and whose videos on localization, cultural traditions, and mythology in Japanese games are genuinely interesting.


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